Intense Stuff

I have been trying to fill my mind with positive mantras about being healthy. It's really hard to do when everything on your body hurts. I decided to spend my day off laying horizontally. My abs hurt when I stand, my butt hurts when I sit, my arms hurt.... Man, EVERYTHING hurts. I haven't felt this dilapidated since we got ran over by an 18-wheeler! We made our trek to boot camp this morning at 8:30am. I was feeling really good about going to bed at 11:30 last night and getting up to get myself on the track to getting fit.




We hopped right in and I immediately started sweating like I had had 8 cups of coffee and 2 Red Bulls for breakfast. Isn't this supposed to get easier? I've determined muscle confusion is more like muscle torture. I was unpleasantly surprised with sprint intervals in between each set. I am not a sprinter. For some reason, my gargantuan boobies like to take control of the situation and try to get ahead of me. It happens every time. I'm running and they want to go faster. Before you know it, I'm toppling over and they decide they'd prefer me get hurt and not cushion the fall and spread out like boob legs leaving me to fend for myself. Speaking of boobs, in between these sets, we also did 1 million squats. I tore my ACL and meniscus in my right leg a few years ago, so when I do anything that impacts my legs, my right knee likes to grow a boob like I am some weird mutant from Total Recall. It wouldn't be such a huge deal if we weren't hopping so much which gives me a knee jerk reaction...literally. By the time I get home, my knee boob is a B cup and my chest boobs are in such pain I feel like I have cancer. Tonight's agenda will include getting a better sports bra so I don't make the mistake again of going to the doctor for a breast exam because I won't get a more supportive sports bra.

I finally push through what seemed like the worst workout day ever. I am sure it's because I went from being sedentary with an "occasional" workout to doing something my body has not endured since sliced bread. I am aching all over but I did push it out as best as I could. I will say, I have never thought I'd actually enjoy a boot camp. It hurts but it is such a wonderful and inspiring experience. Especially with coaches who care about me getting healthy. Sure...every exercise makes me feel like I am some awkward sexual position, but hey! What ever works!




Next on my list, a COMPLETE diet make-over eating even better than how I have this week. I haven't had any cookies but it doesn't mean they didn't turn into my dream night stalkers. ;) I just need to get over sandwiches being my best friends. All of that processed crap has got to cause some health issue. I'll frolic with my hoagie one last time. Good night all!

Crack

Apparently my body has gone into addiction mode with Boot Camp. I'm assuming it's quite possibly what a crack addict would feel when they are feigning for the drugs. It's 3:45am. I am tossing and turning. I try to turn my brain off and get back to sleep but instead I am trying to think up the exercises we may be doing for the upper body workout. I feel Tara stir and she pops up and cracks open her iPad. So here we are, both wide awake and ready to get to boot camp. It's official.....Boot Camp is crack.

The only downside we experienced was getting there on a "Fitness Test" Day. Weights, measurements, push-ups, squats, timed run, etc... I re-confirmed my hate for burpees, my arms feel like spaghetti o's, my abs hurt siting, standing,....even breathing! It's been a long day but I wanted to let my followers know I lived through it so far. Until tomorrow. :)

Survival of the...

Boot Camps really aren't a joke. Once again, I got this nervous feeling on the way there. I got completely winded doing a "warm-up" last class so I had this sneaky little plan to get there a few minutes late, so I could save some of my "wind" for the first circuit set. Maybe it'd stave off the urge to puke. It turned out, our trainer was also running a few minutes late, so my evil little plan was not going to work.  The warm-up wasn't too bad. I was gasping for air after taking a lap, but strangely, it felt great. We come back in to stretch it out a little, then Tara points out the dry erase boards to me. Every single circuit included some sort of squats. Seriously? I just got the feeling back in my buns and my thighs finally stopped being tense! Here we go again!



Every circuit felt like some sort of military punishment. Step up on a box with a squat alternating between step up on a box and squat followed by a side kick. We did reps of 45 alternating between each exercise and side 4 times a piece in EACH circuit. Really? I am already regretting coming to class. After this circuit, we do Burpees, Jacks, Crunches...a few other things that my body completely disagreed with. I will say I do know what Burpees are Burpees. Who would come up with such a exercise? Apparently, someone who is easily entertained by bodily functions.






Next circuit, what I called the "tricep busters". The infamous wall of ropes with jump squats while simultaneously tossing these ropes alternating with some weird plank and touching your opposite toe to your OPPOSITE hand. My limbs kept getting confused. I was pretty sure I'd somehow kick myself in the face. My sweaty palms kept sliding away from me and my feet were trying to figure out why they kept getting so close to my boobs. Do I look like some sort of acrobat? I figure, if I could rip this one out, I should find out about getting into Cirque de Soleil. Can't be that tough, right? At least I don't feel like throwing up. The rope tossing finally slowed my noodle-arms down and I was already breathing heavy contemplating my escape to Starbucks next door.

We move on to the strange rope/chain things hanging out of the wall. I really need to learn the names of these things. We are instructed to do one-legged squats (yes, I laughed a deep belly Santa laugh) alternating between reverse crunches. I sit back into my one-legged squat on my stronger leg. First one felt like I was preparing myself for my "buttock-tical" demise. How does one's butt catch on fire without some sort of weird STD or sexual promiscuity? I was flash-backing to my very first squat to pee while camping. It's 1996 on a camping trip with my family. I am in a state of panic because there are no toilets around, but plenty of space to squat. I bring my sister for moral support. I finally take the trek into the woods, squat down to pee, and bam! I fall directly on top of a hill of FIRE ANTS. While my sister is laughing hysterically, I am running in circles, smacking my butt while peeing all over myself in my state of shock and panic. That was quite a scene. My sister still laughs about my fire ant pee/butt covered in ant bites for weeks incident. Yeesh! I finally modify myself to do deep squats. I didn't want to look like a wimp, so I was pulling out what I could. Then reverse crunches. Not too shabby. The at home pilates is paying off.

Next station was just ridiculous. My uncoordinated body was really in for a surprise. Our first set we held a wheel while pushing forward (wheeled-push-ups?) then back towards our bodies, then out to the left, and finally to the right repeating this for 45 seconds. Okay, now this was laughable. I'm already trying to figure out which dentist will be replacing both of my front teeth. My wrists were shaking and I was so afraid I'd end up planting my face into the ground. What's my obsession with face plants, anyway? I began to joke with Tara about whether or not these little "doo-dads" had a weight limit. Seriously. Every time I pushed forward, the wheel wanted to stop dead in its tracks as if it had a mind of its own. I am still very surprised I still have all of my teeth. Our alternating rep for this set was even worse. We had to swing a medicine ball around in circular motion while lunging on one leg and sliding the other foot around in full circular motion. Sounds simple, right? WRONG! The opposite foot was on a plate. I thought I'd end up doing involuntary splits, falling over and cracking my pelvic region. It was near impossible to stay coordinated, but by gosh I tried. I probably didn't push this rep out as much as I needed to, but hey. I need these legs to walk on and these teeth to not look like some sort of red-neck living in a town where the water is secretly robbing my teeth right out of my mouth.


I hear the words of an angel....LAST CIRCUIT!! I could've jumped up and smacked my heels together. Well, if we are being completely honest about my jumping abilities, it'd be more of a lay down on the floor and clap my heels sort of thing. More butt busters followed by crunches on a Bosu ball (I learned the name of a contraption!). We pulled resistance bands over our shoulders as if we were wearing some hideous Urkel gear and squatted low then stepped up and squatted on that weird springy platform thing. I was waiting for the band to snap. Haha. Imagine that. It looked as if we had full body retainers. The crunches on the Bosu bad was more like a nice little stretch for my back and abdominal muscles and a time to catch my breath. Whew! We finally complete it. I only had to throw up twice this time and my legs didn't buckle on me. I was feeling quite accomplished. We follow everything with a cool-down stretch and a few breathing exercises. I made it!!!! I left with sore muscles and a right butt cheek ache. Someone grab me a beer! Just kidding. ;)

Keeping Up

It wasn't difficult to keep up with a workout regimen throughout the weekend with reasonable diet boundaries. I was a little apprehensive about working out on Friday because my muscles were really angry. Friday and Saturday I did a serious circuit of upper body training with Power flow Yoga. It made me a little concerned about what Upper Body boot camp has in store for me. While doing planks in Power flow, I was pretty sure I'd have some sort of freak accident and break my nose and orbital regions having to have some sort of reconstructive surgery. Can't I just ask the surgeon to suck out some fat layers while he's fixing my face? There's an idea. At some points, my arms trembled. I am pretty convinced it's because they are clairvoyant and know something really bad is going to happen to them this week like last week's lower body fiasco. Arms, please don't go noodle on me.

My biggest challenge is staying away from the bars/alcohol on the weekend. It's not like I am some sort of raging alcoholic. I just like having fun. I'm big into binge drinking weekends, singing karaoke and feeling like shit all of Sunday just to have my Sunday Funday later that night. Unfortunately, my innards disagreed with me after Saturday's night out and made me feel like hugging the porcelain face hell. I should take the moments of "brain farts" I typically have after a weekend of drinking and help that make me decide to save it for a once every few weeks occasion.


On a good note, my muscles feel great and I seem a little smaller in some areas. My clothes are already feeling more comfortable. I will continue this journey and push as hard as I can. Today's workout will be some cardio and upper body followed by the early bird boot camp. Hopefully, I will conquer the machines I still need to learn the names of and continue to fight the urge vomit. This week will be pretty darn interesting.

The Day After...

I can't move. Is this the after effects of a real workout? I'm nervous about what the next few workouts will make me feel like. A sore butt is not great. My sister always says she hurts so good after a workout. I get the good with the rest of my muscles. That only means I am getting stronger, but my butt? Seriously? I need this bad boy to sit on on. Is it some sort of punishment that will make me not want to do any activity that does not require sitting? I'm pretty sure that's the deal. I was going to skip working out today because I am so sore but I heard muscle confusion was best. My muscles are already confused with yesterday's events. So, I am going to keep going with this healthful living idea and get me a long, strenuous workout in. Muscles, don't fail me now!

Hell Day Results

Today was the start of boot camp. The whole way there, I tried to think up a million excuses as to why I could not make it. Maybe a brand new onset case of narcolepsy so when I entered moments of agony, I could pretend sleep for however long I needed to recuperate and energetically hop back in as if I had been woken up out of this long and unaware hibernation. We go to Walmart to buy Tara's weights and yoga mat and off we go to see the weight loss wizard.

We walk into what looked like a daunting place in my mind. Random ropes hooked to walls, bungee cords that must be here for the toddlers to play on, weights, weird round platforms on springy things, and semi-exercise balls. Did they reduce these to lay on the ground to save money? Who knows. We meet our pack leader and are surprised with the ultimate embarrassing request. "Okay, take off your shoes and socks so I can get your weight and fat percentage and then we will do your measurements." I will go ahead and leave out the details of the results. As if divulging this information to a complete stranger was not enough, fellow "camp members" start filing in wearing their half tops and "skinny shorts" while my numbers are being yelled out to be recorded. Bummer! Trembling with anxiety and fear, I neglect to tell our pack leader of my past knee problems, torn meniscus and ACL. I was entirely too caught up in studying the shocking contraptions thinking up each disastrous moment to happen in each circuit.

Here I am grabbing my unflattering capri, hug-your-legs-as-tight-as-you-can attire trying not to be embarrassed of being the heaviest one in the class. She explains we will be doing speed repetition circuits. Each circuit we did 20 seconds of each exercise with 10 seconds of rest repeatedly until reaching 4 minutes and then switching circuits.

We start with squats, lunges, and jumping jacks to warm up. "I can do this. Easy enough." Then we are asked to take a lap. I am not the last one in, so I was feeling pretty good. Then we start the circuit with what I'd like to call the "impossible mini mountain jump." You start on the floor, high jump onto a platform and jump back off....backwards. Anyone who knows me can attest to my clumsiness. First of all, I am 2&# lbs. At 170 lbs., I couldn't even jump more than 2 inches off the ground, so this platform was really scary. I don't think I could even hop a centimeter off the ground! My first try, I missed the whole platform, slid a little bit and am pretty sure I somehow jumped on my own ankle. Embarrassing! I modify myself to speed step ups, which equally hurt. My legs haven't had this much action....ever.  It was only the beginning.

We move on to the springy platform where you had to use your core to balance yourself while doing bicep curls with resistance bands. I'm thinking, "Weight training, this is easy." and request a tougher resistance level. I wonder if she saw me gritting my teeth halfway through. Not the brightest idea to try to go big on my first day. Next, there was a circuit where the wall puked up these large, heavy ropes. We grab the ropes and while doing a jumping jack squat, we circle the big ropes in, then out. At this point I'm trying to figure out how to get rid of this queasy feeling. "Don't puke. Don't puke!" Next circuit, DEEP squat jumps while holding onto bungee cords stretched out from the ceiling. At one point I heard my legs scream, "Damn YOU! Still fight the urge to puke. You can do it!" My legs are trembling and I am a giant sweat pool. I grab some water but realize it was sort of a bad idea. Now I want to puke up water, my innards and brain. I think this would be a good time for my narcolepsy to kick in. Please let this be over soon. We head over to the medicine balls to do "rainbow throws". For some reason it reminded me of Leonardo da Vinci's painting, "The Vitruvian Man". The movements were so swift and circular that my "back air-hole" decides to release its inhibitions. At least it was a silent fiasco. We take a 2 minute break. At first I was over-joyed because I thought we were through. Way to pre-celebrate! This certainly was not the case. We were only half-way through. "Oh goodness! Someone give me a cookie and get me out of here!"

Next circuit was "Speed Side-Way Mountain Climb". Holy Cannoli! At this point my knees are really feeling it. I am slowing down and seeing double. I'm pretty sure I am going to miss the platform any second now and create a domino effect with anyone near me. We move on to the weird springy balance board to do squat rows. My triceps pretty much go numb at this point and I am thinking of the bottle of muscle relaxers sitting at home on the stove. I fight back the vomit surfacing in my throat and am just about ready to quit. That's the good thing about being in a group. You are to embarrassed to quit.

We move on to outer and inner round house squat kicks. I finally feel the fluid collection around my knee and wave the leader down for a modification. Even the modification hurt! My hips and inner thighs are on fire right now. It was the easiest to push through so I keep a fit image of myself in my mind. We move to what I could only call the "spider monkey fell on a cactus family surprise squat jump". It was sort of like a wild form of jumping jacks coupled with turning the floor into a trampoline and squatting. This CAN'T be good for your ankles! I give it a whirl which was a time of laughter at my expense. I looked like I hippo trying to join the cheer squad.

Finally, we hit the last circuit...weighted plank rows. I'm imagining my downward dog face plant once again hoping my weenie arms don't give up on me. I could have drowned in the amount of sweat dripping from my forehead. In my mind I'm thinking I will never do this again. I push it to the end. I took a few breaks in between repetitions, but I made it. SUCCESS! My whole body is aching and confused. Shoot, even I felt a little disoriented. Surprisingly, I am thirsty for more embarrassing moments. The leader asked what we thought of class. I was honest and told her I was afraid to come because I thought it'd be intimidating. She said I did good and at least I didn't give up or puke. I didn't tell her I almost did a few times. All in all, I'd say it was like an Insanity video. The atmosphere was positive and encouraging. I worked so hard that it was not a problem talking myself into trying to eat healthfully, so this torture would not be a waste. Frosted Donuts are looking like chocolate covered turds right about now. I will be back tomorrow. Now children, the moral of the story is... Take some Gas X before you go to a boot camp that forces you to contort your body in "expelling" positions. Until next time...

Day 1 of 30-Let the torture begin!

Boot Camp starts in 2 hours, so here I am getting fueled with a meal replacement and protein shake getting ready for this work out I am deathly afraid of. Note to self:Clif Bar in Cool Mint flavor tastes like a grit covered raisin-plum-grapple sort of concoction. I will stick to oatmeal.




Today marks the beginning of whether I can stand to be exposed in front of a group of people doing exercises, most of which I've never heard of, and fighting the urge to want to run out and hide behind a life-sized box of mac-n-cheese. Mmmm.....mac-n-cheese. So here's goes my best shot. 30 days to jump start a new healthy me!

"Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy."

Dale Carnegie

Diets are Blah!

Ugggghhhh! The dog's food is looking pretty enticing right about now. There ARE real chunks of meat in it. If anyone sees me resorting to getting on all fours beside my child furries, please kick me in the the butt, pick me up and slap me.

I have been trying to get eating healthful things in check. My apple and yogurt didn't taste like the box of Girl Scout Caramels I wanted to eat. Whoever says you get over craving the junk is a flat out liar. Even deep into changing my habits, I dream of bathing in pools of Oreos and milk. I guess I will keep gnawing of these lovely orange sticks and round red things until I get used to it and my reflection in the mirror doesn't make me jump back in disgust when I walk by.

So here I go, dragging my feet to grab my yoga mat and praying my next downward dog is accomplished sans face-plant. Then off to boot camp at the butt crack of dawn. This body better be getting healthy and svelte soon. I'm bound to be that chic living in her bed ordering take-out. #prayingformyself

The Furries of Our Lives

Picking Peyton & Jeter Watts

Tara had a whippet years ago and had always wanted another one. I was not familiar with the breed and after hearing the story of how he chewed through a door frame and locked her out of the apartment, I was quite the skeptic. We couldn't find any breeders or anyone looking to re-home a whippet. A high school friend of mine posted some pictures of her whippets on Facebook while they were out on a play date and I fell in love with them. She said they were quite the social little butterflies. She told me to look through PuppyFinder.com (where she got both of her babies) and I just happened to stumble across a breeder with a litter that was just born. I kept an eye on them and watched how each pup developed in personality. We decided we were ready to add to our family and get a puppy. Peyton was the runt with the lovable and sweet personality. He loved being independent and asked for attention when he needed it. He was also the first puppy to start potty training which was a huge plus for us since it was one of the things we were concerned about. A picture of him was finally posted. We contacted the breeder to let her know we'd chosen Kirby (Peyton's birth name). She often emailed with updates and how he was doing. She sent us a picture of him running through the fields. He was such a cutie pie and we had to have him!

Then one day, I was looking through PuppyFinder again just to look at all the other cute puppies. We had a Doberman while I was growing up and I'd always wanted to have one. We first decided we'd add another puppy to the family after Peyton was a few years old, but lo and behold! There was a litter of Doberman pups about 30 minutes from Peyton's breeder and was born a week earlier! We thought it was destiny and started contact with her breeder. She documented every single day of the litter's lives so we got to get a full picture of what kind of puppy Jeter would be. She had pictures online of how each pup interacted with their siblings. Jeter was energetic by morning, lazy by day and night! She was very smart and loved to play with the puppies in her litter and her Mom's Dalmation sister. We figured she'd be the perfect match for Peyton.

We found both of our future babies late March of 2011 and kept in close contact with the breeders so we couldn't miss a moment of their first 6-7 weeks of life. We picked both of them up on May 12, 2011. At first they seemed uninterested    in each other but inched their way to each other as the night wore on.

Before you knew it, the were best buds sharing the same toys and spooning each other.

They already had a feline brother, Fido, at home waiting for them and he was anxious to sniff out his new family members. He was outnumbered but he let his new canine brothers play with him and then he became one of the dogs. :)

Even though, Peyton did end up being a wall chewer and Jeter likes to play "Minute to Win It" when emptying out her stuffed animals and dog beds, we are so happy with our decision to add Peyton and Jeter to our family. Their companionship and willingness to please has been such a heartwarming experience. We've enjoyed watching them grow into their personalities and while at times training them has been a challenge, we would never trade it for anything in the world. We love our furry, little children. What they say about dogs being the most loyal best friends you could have is true. They really do lighten up your mood and fill your heart with so much love. We love them so much! While having such opposite personalities, they complete each other and our family. :)

Success Rules

Success Rule #1



Your life only gets better when you get better. Your outer world will always be a reflection of your inner world. If you want to improve the quality of your outer world you must go to work on yourself. Since there’s no limit on how much better you can get there’s no limit to how much better you can make your life.


Success Rule #2


It doesn’t matter where you’re coming from, it only matters where you are going. Don’t allow yourself to be slowed down or held back by events that have occurred in your past. You are not your past. Resolve to stay focused on your future and where you’re going. Since your future is only limited by your imagination, there is no limit to what you can achieve in the months and years ahead.






Success Rule #3


Anything worth doing well, is worth doing poorly…at first. Remember, everything is hard, before it is easy. The primary reason that people don’t reach their full potential is that they try something new, and when it doesn’t work perfectly the first time, they quit and go back to their old lower level of performance. Anything worth doing well, is worth doing poorly several times before you master it.


Success Rule #4


You are only as free as your options. In other words, the well developed alternatives that you have available to you. One of the most valuable assets we have is personal freedom. Your freedom is largely determined by your choices. The more options you have, the more freedom and self confidence you have. Refrain from boxing yourself in by limiting your choices. You should be continually be developing new options and skills throughout your life. Never hang all of your hopes for success on a single possibility.


Success Rule #5


Within every problem or difficulty or setback, there is the seed of an equal or greater advantage or benefit. Look for the good in every problem. Look for the valuable lesson in every adversity or set back. Look for something you can gain from every difficulty and you will always find it.


Success Rule #6


You can learn anything you need to learn to achieve any goal that you set for yourself. You are designed by nature to be a learning organism. You can acquire any knowledge and any skill you need to rise to the top of anything that you choose to do. Continually seek out new learning opportunities that are in line with your goals.


Success Rule #7


The only real limits on what you can do or be or have, are the limits you accept in your own mind. Shakespeare said “Nothing is, but thinking makes it so”. Henry Ford said “If you believe you can do a thing or you believe you cannot, in either case you’re probably right”.


You should know that YOU have within you, right now, all the talents and ability you could ever want or need to achieve any goal or dream you can set for yourself. The only question you have to ask is “how badly do I want it?” If you want anything badly enough and you’re willing to persist long enough, nothing can stop you from achieving it. Determine what you want, apply the rules above and do what successful people like yourself do…TAKE ACTION!